Dear Son..
Mama thought we might have to get you refunded at your third week.
As with a first time parent, we enjoyed every bit of the belly-growing
journey, except for those months you gave mama tummy churns and food aversion.
I had never been so health conscious of my body till you started sprouting!
You
were practically have a wing-chun time inside.
One of the best advise we
had listened to was NOT TO BUY ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING SO EARLY. Phew~ without an ounce of shame i say, that's why majority of your stuff you have are
hand-me-downs, lovingly picked out and fervently scrubbed. For that
much money we've scrimped on, it went into better care of our health and
travels. Make fond memories, not hoard possessions okay baby?
At Day 5 of your life, you were so brave to have battled through two
nights of intense phototherapy at the same time being on I/V glucose & normal
saline in W56; following two months of more heel pricks. For the first time i cried for you. It was because KKH had a one-caregiver policy so i was escorted out by the nurse's call to the security guard after their visiting hours. Papa didnt had the heart to go back to an empty home and leave you & i in the hospital, make sense right?
Upon discharge, aunty sheryn tenderly carried you all the way and uncle derrick was more than terrified to hold your tiny one-week old body, but he did :)
We were helplessly in anguish with that part of your life back then. Wished we could
have made wiser choices. To say the least, you will never know what emotional roller coaster we went through to make sure you had the necessary treatments.. But mama will make sure that you remember to always be grateful to Dr Sashi, our dear friend in an invisible hero's cape who has seen you through that early ordeal, had selflessly made you one of his priority in his clinic. Never forget that.
Through exclusively breastfeeding every 2-3
hourly, you were putting on good weight week by week, telling us that
we're doing something really right. The feeding struggles were real(ly painful
at times too). Now mama have iron nipples, i tell you. Papa also wanted
to bond with you through feeding (you were direct-latching), so he
finger-syringe fed you. That tickle of joy when you drank as he fed is
more than what my vocabulary can describe.
Papa had to go back to work after two weeks so you were left solely in my care. You were literally glued to me. Showering, brushing teeth and eating were true luxuries. I couldnt put you down for more than 10 minutes. I tried my best to feed, shower and rock you to sleep. But it wasnt enough for you. You screamed murder each time had i leave you alone in the cot. It wasnt your fault, you had it frustrating too. Ah Yee Irene came to mama's rescue and we packed for a mini staycation over to her place. During one of those nights, it was the first time you ever slept in all the way till dawn... and then mama became engorged after.
It doesnt seems to end, does it?
Again, I cried that night you wouldnt stay awake long enough to drink out all that jammed up milk. I was in so much pain as i cradled you. Overwhelmed with fear from ignorance, I thought it was the end of our breastfeeding journey. I couldnt accept that. Papa hugged me and said everything's going to be alright tomorrow.
It did, after an appointment with macik negativity who massaged the milk out of me.
Above all these exhausting challenges, you're worth it because of the immeasurable love we have for you.
We want to give you the best as we can to the best of our sanity.
We didnt have a live-in help simply because we want to be the ones to witness your little moments and to care for you in our own limited ways. It was a steep learning curve yet we made it thus far! We didnt plan for a baby shower because we thought you might enjoyed it better when you can remember those people you love coming to celebrate your birthday instead.
We want for you to have an uncomplicated happy babyhood.
By the end of first month, you gained to a healthy weight of four kilograms and grew four centimeters. Whenever papa's around, you went out almost daily - for your check ups, our chiropractic appointments, to papa's sports day, for papa's training sessions by the pool & at the stadium and for our waffle dates. You were a total gem for sleeping right through our first foot massage since your birth. Strangers and relatives alike were flustered for words when they came to know how young you were at that time to be outside home. You too had your first massage by mama's jamu lady at home. Later on, we started you to sleep on your tummy and it was the beginning of the best sleep of your life.
This is just the start of our growing family :)
Love,
Your MAMA
